A Change of Heart

I'm sorry it's been awhile.

I took Thumper's advice.

When you're in a bad mood

it's best to just save your complaints in the drafts.

This last week has been a hard one.

I've taken on a real attitude.

(And a sour one at that.)

There have been so many different things thrown at me,

and I haven't reacted in the best way.

I've been feeling really alone

and down on myself.

I'm really struggling with finding friends,

and I've been feeling really alone.

You see,

I'm usually not afraid 

to go out of my way 

to meet someone new.

But this past week 

I've been avoiding 

people and conversations 

at all costs.

(Basically, this last little while has been tough on me.)

Now I don't say this to be all "wo-be-me"

I say this to kinda sketch a little rough draft
of what's going on in my life.
I'm over all of this now.

Because Sunday has been exactly what I've needed.

 

High School is a tough time.

I swear everyone I know,

 and myself included, 

is going through 

a hard time right now.

And so,

I write this to you.

You know who you are.

I'm getting out of this rut.
Maybe what I'm learning can help you, too.

You see,
Last night I had a conversation 

with a dear friend of mine.

And suddenly it all made sense.

I remembered that 

Life is NOT supposed to be a party.

Life is a test.

And sure, 

I've known that all along,

but it made more sense right then
than it ever has before.

And with that purpose in mind,

my perspective 

on the things I've been going through 

has changed completely.

Oddly enough,

I am feeling grateful 

for the storms He's putting me in.

Because you and me,
we're here to go through these challenges.
That's the whole point of life on Earth right now.

We're here to
To learn and to grow.
We're here to deal with the
changes that come our way, 
and to become closer to Him
in the process.

This past week or so
He's humbled me big time.

And I've come to know that
no matter how alone you think you are,
no matter how dumb or insignificant you may feel,
no matter how dark you are inside,
or how badly you think you've sinned,

Our Savior is watching out for us.
Even if we feel like we don't deserve it one bit.
He loves us unconditionally.
I know He cares about you
because I feel His love.

I know He has a plan for you and me,
and I know it involves a lot of bumpy roads.
But I'm excited for that.
Cause man,
I don't know about you,
but I have a whole lot of refining and improving to do!
And for some reason,
that makes me smile.

  Instead of feeling overwhelmed
with a long "To-Be" List
I feel overjoyed.
Because today I am starting fresh.
And ah,
how refreshing this is to leave that all behind.

 He seems to be putting the perfect people
in my life at the perfect time.
(Like what my good friend Emily blogged about,
I too believe everything happens for a reason.)


I love this peace that comes in trusting
and with an assurance that
 He knows what He's doing.

My dear friends,
I love you.
I'm so blessed by your strength
and through your example.

Seriously,
you make a huge difference in my life.
Whether we're close friends,
if I've only talked to you once,
or simply admired you from afar:
your light is a huge strength to me.

I need you to know that
I believe in you.
I know you can get through
the battles you are fighting at this very time.
And not only can you get through this,
but I know from experience
that with His help
you will win.

Don't believe me?
Try it.

Talk to Him.

Ask for His help.
 I dare you.

Because I believe in this quote:

"You are stronger than you seem,
Braver than you believe,
and smarter than you think you are."
-Christopher Robin

You can do this.

And soon you'll discover that 
the person you thought you were 
is no match 
for the one 
you really are.

..What are you waiting for? :)

.Haily.