Whatever You Do, Make It You

Just a little update:

I got a new closet full of clothes 

(for way cheap) the other day.

Platos Closet rocks my world.

My Aunt was so sweet to take me.

 

I ordered a backpack online that seemed big enough to fit 

my school stuff and my art stuff.

That was always a problem last year.

 It came in the mail today.

Goodness,

I think I can fit all of China in here, too!!

It's like a Mary Poppin's bag!!
Seriously though.

..
I love it! :)

On another note,

I am immersing myself into art.

I've been reading so many articles.

Doing everything that is, 

except my AP Art Summer Homework, 

and my commissions.

I am so so bad.

{Mind if I let my thoughts run around for a little bit?

 I don't want them to forget them in these 

ever changing tunnels of words.}

Why is it that when I am supposed to do something

That is when I want to do it the least?

But more importantly, 

why is it that right now 

I can't bring myself to do what I don't want to do?

I'm getting so bored with replicating things.

I know that's what my parents like best.

That's what they understand the most.

That's what they're proud of.

But I am getting so tired of it.

I'm so tired of using pictures

and following everything perfectly.

That was really fun for me for awhile.

I was really bad at it, and the more I did it the better I got.

I love learning and improving.

But I really just need to take a break from that.

I need to give my eyes a break, 

and give my heart it's canvas.

That is my goal right now.

I haven't done that in so very long..

I miss it.

Actually, I can't remember the last time I did that.

I dont think I ever have in this life.

I like to think I was an Artist before I came here.

My soul just longs to create,

and there's no way this old soul of mine 

didn't express itself through some sort of art before.

I want to paint from my heart.

As they said about Carl Bloch,
"He dipped his paintbrush in his heart."

Isn't that beautiful?

It's just, when I use a picture there's no bit of Haily in there.

I'm taking what the world sees and replicating the original.

What's so special about a replica???

When someone sees a painting I did I want them to feel something,

I want them to think differently

I want them to say,
"You can tell Haily painted that. It has her personality in there."

I want to imbed my thoughts and ideas in there.

I'm so far from doing that.

It's partially overwhelming that I have so much that I don't know yet,

and partially exciting that I still have so much to learn.

I know exactly what I want to do

I've just got figure out how to do it.

”To all viewers but yourself, 

what matters is the product: 

the finished artwork. 

To you, and you alone, 

what matters is the process.”  

-Art and Fear, page 5.

”What separates artists 

from ex-artists 

is that those who 

challenge their fears 

continue; 

those who don’t, 

quit.”  

Art and Fear, page 14.

And I am no quitter. :)

Have an amazing day today, okay?

I know art rambles really doesn't interest most of you,

but I hope maybe you got something out of it.

If nothing else, here is the main point:

Whatever you do,

make it you.

(Oo, I like that. That is sticking.)

Farewell wonderful reader.

If you have any thoughts on this topic,

or about China in my backpack,

please comment below.

I'd love to hear what you have to say!

The Miracle of Painting
We make a mark on the canvas and when we look back, we see something that seemingly was not there a moment ago. And there is that miracle: by virtue of making marks, we have created ourselves a tiny bit more – and we actually can see more, feel more, because we have become more, by that tiny bit.

Were we not making marks we would not be able to see much at all, except that which we are supposed to see, that which everyone sees – the expected, the names of things, trees, sky, house, person, the facts, the obvious. You must see past these things. Taste with your eyes. Listen with them. Understand that the activity of painting is about the thrill, the enhanced moment you might realize. Then you will see. Then you will become.